Do you believe in ghosts? Yes, me neither. None of that. Weird things happen, and I’m sure that even if I can’t explain them, there must be some explanation.
This blog has deteriorated into a bit of memorial of loved ones who’ve passed on occasion. I don’t set out to make it such. There was joking early on that this would be a Dachshund Blog, because I just kept talking about them. There was goodbye Sebastian about my mother’s Dachshund Sebastian who’d died. Then I wrote about the dog I had before the sister and brother Vizslas, who I mention often, when I wrote my rays of sunshine.
Yet I don’t want you to be led to believe I only care about dogs. It might be the truth, but I’d rather at least give the impression that people matter to me, as well.
Recently, I said goodbye to my maternal grandmother. We scattered her ashes in the river near where she’d lived and then I promptly wrote about her here in always fifty-five. There was some delayed grieving because it took a while to arrange a date where everyone in the family could be there, but we did it. And being where I’d spent so much time with her somehow made me feel closer to her.
One of the finest people I’ve known virtually died earlier this year (I wrote about her in smoke and mirrors), and it still gets me. In quiet moments, I can still feel her presence. But remember, I don’t believe in the spirits staying with us. None of that. You die and your gone. Basta.
Have never been much interested in the spirit world. When a psychic was on television, I normally found something else. I’d hear that there are some people who are more attuned to the spirit world, and I’d quickly say to myself, ‘Well, I’m not one of those people.’ Then I’d move on.
I suppose, for the most part, that’s still my position. Except I’ve had a few moments during this trip when I wasn’t so sure. Let me explain.
Most of the people, in my life, who’ve died recently have been older. But one friend died who was my age. Actually, he was a bit younger. I’m not going to go into the details much, because I know he and his family were rather private. But driving by the places I once lived and spent time with him, I’ve been replaying the memories.
It’s been the hardest and most important part of this trip. Somehow his passing didn’t touch me when it was so far away. Sure, it was sad. And inconceivable. However, with my daily life in Germany swirling round me, his passing was somehow ‘over there’. Not going to touch me.
But fast forward to several days ago. I found myself on the side of the road after an auto accident, and couldn’t believe what had happened and how quickly. Suddenly, I felt like my friend was there with me. Surely that can be explained by my thinking so much of him over the previous days. It was clearly my subconscious creating the feeling of his presence.
Yes, that’s it. Of course.
If you read this blog even sporadically, you know that I like to come up with things that make one ponder. To attempt to see things in a bit different manner, when at all possible. I’m as sceptical of the spirit world as I was before.
Nevertheless, I’ve slowed down in his honour if he is watching. Just in case.